Peanut's First Christmas

It's sad what the nurses and I will come up with for entertainment purposes. Isn't she cute??

Whenever I see this pic of her and her teddy bear I think of that doll back in the eighties that was called My Buddy and the song that went with it ... My Buddy ... My Buddy and Me!!!! I'm going to be singing that all day now. I hope you will, too.

got milk?

I do.

Impressed?

I am.

Just hear those sleigh bells ring-a-ling ....

The last week has been CRAZY!!! Things were moving along just fine (Charlotte was even starting to drink a little bit from a bottle), and then on Friday morning she got ANOTHER infection and they had to put the ventilator back on. She just can't get a break. This one came through her IV line just like the last one, so they had to take it out and put another one in a few days later. One of the nurses explained to me that the blood infections are usually caused by bacteria that live on her skin, however, when those bacteria get into her blood stream her immune system is too immature to fight them off. An adult's immune system is typically advanced enough to handle that little amount of bacteria. Hopefully in a few days her feedings will have increased enough that they can remove that main IV line and there will be one less source for infection to enter her body.

Now that's she's "older" (we just passed the 35 week mark gestationally, meaning she's still 5 weeks premature) Charlotte is treated like any other newborn that gets a fever and an infection - meaning they had to give her a spinal tap to see if she had meningitis. Luckily everything came back normal on that culture.

But there is a happy ending to this saga. Brian and I got a call last night around 7pm and Charlotte pulled out her tube on her own. They weren't even planning to try and extubate her until later in the week, but Charlotte knows best. I went to see her last night and she seemed pretty tuckered-out, but she looked great and more content than she had been over the weekend. And *yay!* today I get to dress her, and love her and squeeze her and call her George (if you haven't seen that Looney Tunes episode then don't worry)!

On Friday, Charlotte received her first haircut due to a failed IV attempt. It sounds horrible, but it's actually quite common. You can see in the photo how her head is shaved a bit on the side. The other side is shaved as well, so she now has her first mohawk. It's never to early to express yourself.

I'd like to send a shout-out to the folks at Ecolab for all the wonderful gifts you sent over! Thank you so much for all the diapers, wipes, outfits, blanket, pillow, bibs, gift card - we appreciate everything you did. Although, I'd like to apologize for my husband who neglected to open the gifts in front of everyone. I told him that he denied everyone their chance to oooh and aaah. But he's a man, so we need to cut him a little bit of slack. In the summer, when Charlotte can get around I will definitely bring her over to the office.

I hope that everyone had a great Christmas and that Santa was good to you. My parents got me a jogging stroller so that Charlotte and I can run around the neighborhood next summer. It even has speakers and a hook up for my MP3 player. wow! My best gift of all was being able to hold Charlotte yesterday even while she was on the ventilator. It's amazing what some snuggles and kisses can do for you.

On Christmas Eve my family came to my house to enjoy our traditional Christmas chop suey. Later that evening Brian and I went to the hospital and read a bit to Charlotte. That is until daddy fell asleep. He gave the nurses quite a giggle.

SANTA!!!!!

Ho! Ho! Ho! Santa stopped by the NICU yesterday for a chat with the parents and a quick pat on the head for all the babies. It was so great of him to come by. For a moment it felt like everything was normal for us parents. No tubes, no incubators, no wires - just us, our babies and the excitement of Christmas. People like Santa are just frickin awesome!

I even got a pic of all of us. This will come in handy just in case Charlotte gets a KrisKringlephobia like I had. Yes, I was scared of Santa growing up. My mother didn't get a decent picture of me on Santa's lap until I was almost 20. Hopefully Charlotte won't have that same irrational fear (but he is kind of intimidating...).

Our family room is complete and over the last few days I have been getting Charlotte's room ready. I have a couple more things to hang on the wall and then it's pretty much ready. Our house is almost back in order. We still have to finish the laundry room, but that's been put on the back burner until after Christmas. It's time to stop for a moment and just enjoy the season.

I went into my work this past Monday and handed in my resignation. Yep, I am officially a stay-at-home mom now. It feels weird being unemployed, but I'm glad that we can do this and that I can be there to take care of my little peanut when she comes home.

Speaking of our little peanut, she is doing great. As of yesterday, she was up to 3 pounds, 2 ounces. We think that quite a bit of that is water weight, which is supposedly quite common with preemies. I'm able to interact with her a lot more now - give her baths, change her clothes and even change her poopy diapers. I still get excited everytime I can change a diaper. I'm sure one day the thrill will wear off.

Here's a couple more pics. The first one is Charlotte showing off her new booties that one of the nurses gave her. Everytime I see this picture I think "Wow, she's getting so big", which she is, but check out the hands of the nurse holding her and that puts things into persepctive. The second one is our "family Christmas picture". I realize that it's not very Christmasy, but at least Brian and I put on a nice top.

FAQs

1. When is Charlotte coming home?
The doctors don't like to pinpoint a specific time, because they don't want you to hold them accountable to that. However, they do tell you that most of their premature babies will go home sometime around their due date. Charlotte was due on January 30th. There is a possibility that she could go home earlier, but that may require her to come home on oxygen or still eating with a feeding tube. Two options that we are willing to work with in order to have her home as soon as possible. The criteria for allowing her to go home is not a specific weight, but just that she is gaining weight, she's strong and that she is not having frequent drops in her stats (i.e. blood pressure, heart rate, and oxygen saturation).

2. Are you going back to work?
Not at present.

3. Are you moving anywhere?
Not at present.

4. How often do you go to the hospital?
Since I can't get my ass out of bed before 8am, I don't go in the mornings. Between 9am-noon, the NICU is "closed" while the doctors and nurses do their rounds. That's mainly for privacy reasons so that you don't hear the business of the other families around you. This works out pretty well for me because then I can take the morning for myself and get errands done or take care of things around the house (i.e. sit on the phone with insurance companies). Usually I go to the hospital around noon, stay until dinner time, come home and eat and then go back in the evening. So, if anyone ever wants to get ahold of me I would suggest calling me before 11am.

5. How is she doing?
Charlotte is doing great. Yesterday the doctors had planned to take her off of the ventilator again, but the little pip-squeak just couldn't wait and she took it out herself. She starting to wear clothes, which may not sound like a big deal, but anything that brings her into the realm of "normalcy" makes me so happy. And plus, she looks so darn cute in her teeny-tiny onesies. I'll try and get a pic today. She has been diagnosed with chronic lung disease (bronchopulmonary dysplasia to be exact), which means that with her lungs being so premature and her having already gone through two bad infections, she will be easily succeptible to lung infections. The nurses have told me that she can grow out of this in a year, but she will more than likely be left with asthma and will probably get chest colds more easily than other kids. So, don't be surprised if you see us constructing a bubble outside of our house when we get her home.
I read the other day in a book that Charlotte means "little, strong, courageous woman", and that is exactly what she is. Everytime I look at her she gives me strength.

6. Is she eating?
Yes, Charlotte is being fed breast-milk every two hours through a feeding tube. They increase the amount each day as she tolerates. Today she should be getting 6cc every two hours. The milk is supplemented by IV fats and other nutrients. Once she gets up around 13 or 14 ccs they will take her off the IV fluids. Next week they might let her try a bottle. At the moment her mouth is too small for any of the nipples and they don't want her to choke on it.

7. How much does she weigh?
2 pounds 10 ounces. The goal is for her to gain .5-1 ounce per day.

8. Are you sending out Christmas cards this year (no one has actually asked this, but I wanted to address it)?
No. I'm shooting for Casimir Pulaski Day cards this year (http://www.eiu.edu/~insight/pulaski/pulaski.htm). Or maybe just sometime in the new year. So, let me take this time to say Merry Christmas -Love, Brian, Mandi and Charlotte.

Two Steps Forward ... Two Steps Back

I haven't been on the computer much over the past week. Hence a week with no posts. I was busy enjoying my daughter. Last Monday Indiana Grandma got to hold her for the first time (see picture) and I got to hold her all week for hours and just watch her facial expressions. Unfortunately, Brian got a cold near the end of the week so he hasn't been able to hold her for awhile. But as long as he wore a mask he could go in and see her.

I got some good news from my hematologist last Tuesday and I don't have to take my twice daily blood thinner shots anymore. Hallelujah!! I feel so free. I also received some good news from my OB last Friday at my last appointment, and after seven long months of waiting I can finally do situps again! Seriously, I'm excited.

With her feedings increasing daily last week, Charlotte has started to put on weight. As of the last weigh-in she weighed 2lbs 4 oz (1.02 kilo) and measured 14 inches. Some of her saggy skin is finally starting to fill in. Yay!

But, as we already know, things don't stay smooth sailing forever in the NICU. Saturday night Charlotte started to have hourly heart rate drops and lots of fluid coming up from her lungs, which resulted in her having to be put on the ventilator again. Yesterday the doctors found some bacteria growing in a culture taken in the morning, and they have concluded that she has an infection in one of her IV lines. Why don't they just take it out, you ask? It's not quite that easy. This IV goes into her arm, up her arm, across her chest and ends directly above her heart so that they can get medication and nutrients to the right place quickly. Not the easiest thing to insert. So, in the immediate future, the doctors are giving her a cocktail of antibiotics through that line in the hopes that it will not only get rid of the infection in the rest of her body, but also clean out that line. The doctors are hoping that as soon as the antibiotics kick in they can start weaning her off of the ventilator.

AAArgh! I swear, when I look in the mirror I can see myself aging right before my eyes! By the time Charlotte gets home I'm going to be ready for assisted living, which may not be all that bad ....

Daddy's Little Girl

Lots of good changes over the last two days!! Charlotte was taken off the paralyzing drug the other day and she seemed quite calm and rested afterwards. They started feeding her breast-milk again - 1cc every 3 hours, and that amount should start to increase soon. And the best one of all - they took her off the ventilator yesterday and she's breathing on her own! Fingers-crossed that she's able to stay off this time!

Right after they took the ventilator tube out and before they put the oxygen tube up her nose I was able to get a pic of what our little peanut looks like tube-less. Man, was she ever pissed off that she had been woken up for this! It appears as though she has my nose, but beyond that I'm not very good at picking out similar body features. (And see that guy holding Charlotte's head? That's Ed, my acupuncturist. He doubles as a Respiratory Therapist at Loyola. Seems quite fitting that he helped us to have Charlotte and now he's helping her get better.)

We were going to wait until today to hold her, so as to not overstimulate her, but the night nurse saw no need to wait. So, last night Brian got to hold his little girl for the first time. I can tell that she's already got him wrapped around her little, itty-bitty finger. Look at her - she's already trying to figure out how she can get daddy to buy her a plasma TV for her crib.

Yesterday was a very good day! I'm looking forward to many more days like that.

Like Mother, Like Daughter

Not too much has changed since my last post. Charlotte appears to be over the pneumonia infection, but her lungs are going to take awhile to heal. On Sunday she was switched back to the normal ventilator, but all her settings have remained pretty high and they're trying to wean her settings down VERY, VERY slowly.
She was off of the paralyzing drug for almost 24 hours, but again she was too fidgety and feisty and they had to put her back on. But I did get a photo of her taking a quick little snooze in between kicking and waving her arms about (more like passed out from exhaustion). She reminds me of her mother after a few too many glasses of wine.
For the next few days she will be undergoing some steroid therapy and we're all hoping that opens and clears her lungs so they can try and wean her off the ventilator again. Hopefully by next week her daddy will be able to hold her. Maybe they can even kangaroo and she can pull out some of his chest hair:-)
I hope that everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving. Even though Brian and I have had a very difficult year we still have a lot to be thankful for - our time with our sons, our beautiful daughter, each other, our family and friends. Going through this has really changed my perspective on life and put my priorities in order - life is way too short.

We've Got a Two Pounder

As of yesterday Charlotte is officially two pounds! That may not sound like a lot to most people, but to us that's a huge milestone. Granted some of that weight may be from waterweight that accumulated while she was immobile this past week, but it's still two pounds!
One of the tests sent earlier this week checking for infection came back positive today and the doctors seem pretty sure that Charlotte had pneumonia. Thankfully, from the start they have been treating her with the antibiotics that target pneumonia , so the infection should be on its way out. The infection has taken quite a toll on her lungs and she will probably have to be on the ventilator for awhile longer. At the moment she's on the "new" ventilator they have, which gives her 600 breaths/minute. Supposedly this ventilator does less damage to the lungs than a traditional ventilator, but because it delivers so many breaths per minute she usually needs to be paralyzed to help her relax. I hate to see her paralyzed because she can still hear what's going on and feel people touch her, but she can't move or respond. I'm hoping that by tomorrow they'll be able to take her off that drug and she'll be back to doing her hourly aerobic routines.
Several people have asked me what she's eating. At the moment just fats and other nutrients delivered via IV, but she has been able to get breast-milk off and on, depending on how stable she is (1cc every 6 hrs - mice eat more than that). There's talk of starting her back on the milk tomorrow and I really hope so because a) she needs to get some meat on those bones, and b) I'm running out of room in our freezer for the milk.

Ups and Downs

When they told me at the NICU that it would be a roller coaster ride I didn't realize the ups and downs would be so dramatic. I expected a few dips in the road, but not like this past weekend. The middle of last week was great for Charlotte. On Wednesday Charlotte was having some difficulty with her breathing tube - either there was a leak or it wasn't in place correctly, no one could tell exactly - so the doctor decided to take it out and see how she did breathing on her own. With a very nervous mommy standing by they took out the breathing tube, turned off the ventilator and my little girl was breathing on her own! We were warned that it's very rare for babies this tiny to be able to stay off for a prolonged period of time, but every day that she can be off the ventilator means less damage to her lungs. Charlotte was able to stay off until Friday afternoon. Just long enough to be held twice by her mom.

The first time I held her in my arms and I got to really experience how tiny she is, but she cooed at me and had her eyes open most of the time. I have to say that was probably the happiest moment of my life and one of the few times during this experience that I really felt like a mom. The second time I held Charlotte was on Friday and they stuffed her down the front of my shirt so that she could "kangaroo". I don't know how well known "kangarooing" is, but it's a method developed in South America as a way of keeping premature babies warm through skin-to-skin contact. Supposedly it's very effective in keeping their heartrate and breathing stable. It was kind of an odd sensation for me because I couldn't really see her and it felt like someone had put a hamster down my shirt.

Shortly after I held her for the second time she started to show signs of distress, so the staff put her breathing tube back in and put her back on the ventilator. Basically all weekend long she's been fighting a pretty nasty infection and she's been very sick. All of her cultures have come back negative, which sounds like a good thing, but it would be easier for them to treat her if they knew exactly what they're up against. The last 24 hours have been better and while it's going to take her awhile to recooperate from this episode we're happy to finally see signs of improvement.

So, as we have been, we just take things day by day. Actually, more like hour by hour.

Brian and my father have made quite a bit of headway on our family room (formerly the attached garage). Almost all of the insulation is up and they've started drywalling the ceiling. Hopefully by the end of this weekend all of the drywall will be up and Brian can start taping.

Little Kisses

There is a nurse in the NICU who makes Halloween costumes for all the babies on Halloween and then the other nurses take pics for the parents. It's pretty funny to see some of these kids dressed up. My favorite (after my own children, of course) was this little baby girl that was dressed up as a "little wench". It was hilarious! I hope her parents weren't pissed off. Charlotte, Gus and Jake were all Hershey's kisses.

Two Months Later

For those that are checking here for updates on the babies, I apologize for taking so long to post something. It's been pretty hectic around here and I haven't had the opportunity, nor the energy to sit down and type. As most people probably know our son Jake passed away last Thursday on November 2nd. Our other son, Gus, passed away on Monday night (Nov. 6). Both of our sons died due to complications from being premature. We are so lucky to have been able to spend the time we had with both of them and we are comforted by the fact that they are now together in a safe and loving place.

Thank you to everyone who has offered their help and support. Brian and I don't really need anything at this point - we're remembering to eat and sleep - and we are putting all of our energy and focus on Charlotte. If anyone would like to make any memorials please send your donations to March of Dimes at www.marchofdimes.com. The March of Dimes donates a lot to the NICUs. Every hat and blanket you see in the pictures has been donated by them.

I'll back up a bit for those who haven't heard what happened over the past few weeks. I went to the doctor on Oct. 10th when I was 24 wks pregnant only to find out that I was 1 cm dilated and having regular contractions. After pumping me full of meds to stop the contractions I stayed at the hospital for four days just to remain under observation and make sure that I didn't start going into labor again. Shortly after midnight on Oct. 23rd Brian and I went to Labor and Delivery because I was having contractions again. At this point they realized that my water had broken, which meant I would have to be hospitalized for the remainder of my pregnancy. I was hoping that the remainder of my pregnancy would be longer than 12 hours, but it didn't turn out that way.

At 9am I was feeling fine, the contractions had stopped, and I hadn't dilated any further. The nurses were even trying to sort out which room to put me in for my "long" stay. At 2pm I was fully dilated and the doctor told me my daughter had black hair. It's amazing how quickly things can change! It's also amazing how quickly the staff moves at L&D. At 2:02pm I was on the phone telling Brian to get his ass over there as fast as possible and at 2:14pm I was out cold and the triplets had been welcomed to this world.




First out was Charlotte Martina, weighing in at 1 lb. 6 ounces. Charlotte always seems to want her hands waving above her head and she just never stops moving around! I think I'm really going to have my hands full with her! :)










Next was Gus Philip at 1 lb. 13 ounces. He was the biggest of the three. However you can see how small he actually was next to Brian's hand.














And rounding out the trio was Jake Lachlan, who weighed
1 pound 9 ounces. Jake had such long limbs. We have no idea whose side that came from.



Life in the NICU is pretty much a roller coaster ride. One minute you've taken a step forward and something good has happened and the next minute you've taken two steps back. But I'm constantly amazed at how wonderful the staff are there. I don't how they do it, but they've created such an open, warm and caring environment.

Of course, I'll still be glad to get out of there when Charlotte comes home!

Speaking of Charlotte, she is doing well today. She had a rough weekend and her lungs were having some problems, but they gave her a few rounds of steroids and she seems to be doing much better!

Tomorrow I'll try and post some pics from Halloween (oh yes, we had costumes) and I'll show you Charlotte's new home (no more saran wrap roof - which for those who might be wondering is actually a good thing because it contains the humidity to moisten their skin).

Visitors from St. Louis

Last week week we had special visitors come up from St. Louis for a few days - Kari, Teddy and Isabella! Kari took me on an outing to Babies R Us to register for the plethora of baby goods I'm going to need. I can't believe all the crap they need! And everything has so many bells and whistles I'm worried that we're all going to have seizures from being over-stimulated!

Kari was given the rare opportunity to push me around in a wheelchair and she seemed to enjoy having me confined behind the big basket that was in front of me. Do I wander off that much? Am I that much of a handful? All those years of asking people how far they'd go for me if I was in a wheelchair, well now I know Kari would at least push me around. Luckily I did not bring a camera to this event.
That was my last real outing I think. Today I'm 20 weeks along and this is when the real bedrest starts to come into play. Although, I'm going to ask at my next doctor's visit if I can still go to McDonald's for a cone.

Check out the t-shirt I got from Kari and Teddy! I can't wait to wear it out in public (i.e. I'll just go stand on my front porch in it). Dear God, I look like I ate Isabella.

We're closer to getting our permit for the renovations we want to do on our old attached garage. Hopefully by the end of this week we can get the plumber guy in to get rid of our catch-basin and then Brian can start tearing down walls!

More after my doctor visit on Thurs!

Dueling Bellies

Ok, so it took me awhile to post again, but first of all I don't really do very much and second of all I couldn't get the pictures to upload.

Patty's baby shower was on August 20th. Here's a picture of the two of us in the backyard at her sister's house. Who knew that the BFFs that once claimed they would never have kids (because it would cut into beer drinking time) would be pregos at the same time?!

It was a very cute shower - laid back, good food and plenty of oohs and aaws as Patty opened her gifts. I even caught myself doing it a few times (help!).

Mandi's Bday

It's my birthday and it looks like this year I got myself a double chin! You'd think I'd already put on those 50 pounds I need to add, but I'm sure in a few months I'll look back at this picture and think I'm skinny.
Brian's been working in the backyard all day finishing off some projects that have been haunting us for some time. Tonight my parents are coming over for Burger King and Dairy Queen. A wholesome meal all around, I must say!
In the end a very relaxing way to turn 31!

August 12, 2006

Welcome to the Team Hellyer site! This sounded like a good way to pass the time while I'm on bedrest. Our lives are pretty boring at the moment, but in the next few months I'm sure we'll have plenty of life-changing events to report.

Brian picked up our first baby purchase this morning - a triplet stroller that we bought on eBay. This thing is HEAVY! But I think it will be practical for family outings.